I want to share my music with you! Follow this link to a recording from Radio Valencia’s “Pure Pop for Queer Lovers” broadcast, hosted by my dear friend Adrienne and the fabulous Mija.
And for your inspirational pleasure, please read below for a personal reflection.
Anticipate the next five minutes of your life.
What might those five minutes hold? Does their world excite you?
Are you scared of them?
I wish I did not fear the future.
I want to want nothing from the next five minutes save that they have room for me.
Yet I can’t help hoping that they hold inspiration and fire and friendship and a way out from my worst parts. “Me” is much. Wanting room is wanting the world. Room for my sky-high ambitions, my laziness, my fatal flaws.
Sometimes I wrestle with myself, and make demands.
I beg of myself, “Be present! Live in the moment.” Instead, I shroud myself with shadows from What May Lie Ahead.
I keep leaking out of now, and peeking ahead.
Like when I read. My eyes flick ahead to the next word. That upcoming word bumps hips with the word that came before it.
The future ripples backwards and forms my experience of the present.
I am trying something new.
I figure: my world has plenty of room for the next five minutes. Who am I to deny them?
I hold myself as beautiful and vile. But when the future beckons me out of myself, I will expect beauty.
Instead of shutting out these unknown moments, I will invite myself into them.
Out of the fuzzy future, I will mold myself a Welcome sign.
“Put It Into Play!”
My body is borne of buoyant water. I need support. I love to fall into the fold of my friends.
And I crave the chance to be there for them.
Sometimes my friends are mired in anxiety. Scared to move forward. Taught to do only when doing is right. To know, then act.
Welcome to self-paralysis.
I gave my friends a thought-arrow, to pierce a path through the muck.
You may fear doing wrong. But try anyway. Don’t plan for forever – live out loud. Bump into the world and see what happens.
Every morning, when you wake up, let the first thing you say be: “Put it into Play.”
Now you try, and let me know how it goes!